44 things I did for Stupid

1. Filmed an entire Christmas Day, including stocking opening in bed at 6am, with a family I had only known 3 days.

2. Recorded Immam singing the Muslim call to prayer on the tower of a Mosque at night.

3. Found best spot in Mumbai slums for filming of planes overhead (was in a human toilet.)

4. Controlled drunken crowd at infamous New Orleans jazz club, The Spotted Cat.

5. Tried to find veggie, takeaway food without too much packaging in Jordan / France / Nigeria (India easy).

6. Persuaded French builders to screw massive wooden box into a post on ski field.

7. Ordered 20 chickens for Iraqi refugee kids' talent show we arranged.

8. Waited 6 days in Mumbai for Jeh when he was actually in London.

9. Arranged gig for Niger Delta Freedom Fighters 16-piece Band with 24 hours notice.

10. Tried to make arrangements in France at Sunday lunchtime.

11. Filmed secretly on Go Air plane to get slums shot.

12. Designed Arabic logo for fake TV channel.

13. Organised Jordanian military helicopter for filming aerials of Amman while entertaining small child.

14. Had a makeover in New Orleans.

15. Tried to find tandem bike to hire in Chamonix (with my crap French).

16. Made small talk in the lift with Oil Company workers.

15. Cycled 10km in the rain with Franny on the back of my bike shouting directions "speed up, go left" etc.

16. Went on a Devastation tour with other tourists in New Orleans.

17. Distracted Shell PR man on oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico.

18. Spotted Nigerian bank official tried to rip us off by 90% of our transfer.

19. Held tripod legs still for a steady pan while gagging on smell of rotting mouse, New Orleans.

20. Skied La Vallee Blanche with camera running in backpack (to record sound).

21. Charmed owner of private jet so that we could film his plane.

22. Rabble roused crowd of Nigerian's trying to inspire them to dance.

23. Sung Frere Jacques in French restaurant.

24. Organised purchase of HDV Camera in Baghdad.

25. Browsed Arabic music store for perfect track.

26. Guarded a snowman.

27. Driven round the block 15 consecutive times w Hazard lights on.

28. Scouted out tall building for a wide shot in Houston.

29. Got camera bag sewn by tailor on street in India.

30. Taken £5,000 out of personal bank account to pay for Iraqi kids sponsorship.

31. Ate wedding cake at a wedding where I didn't know anyone, bar Franny.

32. Entertained homeless cigarette sellers in hotel foyer, Amman, Jordan.

33. Told photographer "trying his best wasn't good enough".

34. Gave Testimony in Nigerian Church (!)

35. Watched bank robber movie while being plied with lots of tea at the Iraqi border.

36. Hid huge wadges of cash in Nigeria.

37. Made band play intro of song 8 times so that it would start at right time in shot.

38. Inhaled CS gas from back of Jet Car at Santa Pod raceway.

39. Persuaded unruly and suspicious jazz band to sign crew agreements.

40. Attended safety briefing with Big Oil Company bosses.

41. Worked out best Zen breathing and body position for stable train timelapse shot.

42. Trawled through archive system at CNBC offices in Mumbai.

43. Organised a drama shoot with an Oscar-nominated actor in a carpet warehouse in Neasden.

44. Shared a beer with Pete Postlethwaite, after filming tthe drama scenes.