Money and website solved in one

Location Train back from Oxford. 23.50pm | Mood Clearing of the fog | Date 16 March 2007
Slightly frightening that Crude pal Mark Lynas has dreamt up, researched, written and published a book, 'Six Degrees', all within the Crude timescale. Lizzie and I went to the launch in a cold church hall in Oxford tonight. Mark was doing one of his favourite slide-show talk presentation things - think Al Gore, but way bleaker - which I've now seen plenty of times, but never fails to scare the bejeezus out of me.

Going into the sadness

Location Pub opposite De Lane Lea, Soho | Mood Strangely isolated, as though everyone is talking about someone else's film | Date 9 February 2006
Second funding evening tonight. Last time we were asking for 500 quid a punt, this time it was 5000. Which seems an enormous amount of money to me, but didn't seem to cause too many raised eyebrows. We slightly picked the number out of a hat - but then said people could also get a "half loan" – i.e. 2500. Played the trailer tonight. First time we've had Crude up on the big screen. Seemed pretty coherent to me. Everyone loved Fernand. Friendly Funder spoke again and was even better than last time.

"You'll be kissing goodbye to your cash..."

Location Chained to Avid in office making Crude trailer | Mood Spaced out | Date 2 February 2006
I've made trailers of other films and they take only a few days. But that's when you're making one from the finished film, I now realise. Whereas we've got 87 hours of footage and not much idea of what we're trying to do. Even watching all that would be more time than we have - 5 days of David The Editor.

20,000 pounds in the kitty

Location Head in toilet at home | Mood Self-pitying | Date 25 January 2006
Human pyramid with the Guy Family, Fernand & Fernand's wife (Nicole) Photograph: Charlotte Rushton

Minus 9000 pounds in the Crude account

Location Spanner Films office (aka spare room in stepmum's flat) | Mood In need of inspiration | Date 3 January 2006
Well, that was a depressing Xmas and New Year surrounded by reproducing family units. And it is of course a well-known fact that you can either be a filmmaker or have successful personal relationships. Still, as Helen Steel says, it's not that she feels great for fighting McLibel, it's that she would have felt much worse if she hadn't. I'd hate myself forever if I chose babies or comfort over Crude.

Sold 100th Crude share

Location SF office (in my house) | Mood Internal satisfaction | Date 25 June 2005
John Battsek convincing people to fund Crude McLibel finally made it onto BBC2 a few weeks back - a mere ten years since I started - which ramped up the Spanner Films publicity 10000% and meant we today sold our 100th Crude share, I

17,500 quid in the kitty

Location Lying on sofa at home, Camden | Mood Relief | Date 14 December 2004
I can't remember being really scared about anything for a long, long time. Walking home through the woods aged 17 after watching Silence of the Lambs is still my worst ever. And getting locked up and given tea by the dam construction company on our first night in India was fairly terrifying.